A woman and a man are involved in a car accident. It’s a bad one. Both of their cars are demolished but amazingly neither of them is hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, ‘So, you’re a man… That’s interesting. I’m a woman. Wow, just look at our cars!
There’s nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days.’
The man replied,’ I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God!
The woman continued, ‘And look at this, here’s another miracle… My car is completely demolished, but this bottle of wine didn’t break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.’
Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. The man asks, ‘Aren’t you having any?’
She replies, ‘Nah. I think I’ll just wait for the police…’
Men will never learn
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Just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to, doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have. Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end.
He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.
Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out. When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna’s heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.
When she went to tell Edna the news, she said, ‘Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you’re being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love. I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.
The bad news is, Ralph hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he’s dead.’
Edna replied, ‘He didn’t hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?’
Today is Mental Health Day! You can do your bit by remembering to pass on the link to this post to an unstable friend……
Done my part!!! Posted via email from nischal’s posterous | Comment »
We’ve all heard about people having Guts or Balls.
But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition for each is listed below :
GUTS - is arriving home late after a night out with guys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: “Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?”
BALLS - is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say: “You’re next.”
I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions. Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome since both ultimately result in death. Posted via email from nischal’s posterous | Comment »
Liked the concept. You just need to enter your name and the site would search up the internet to understand your likes and dislikes and provide you with feed from various sites matching your likes!!
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